Ethereal Edition: Words from the Heart

heartI don’t mind championing my successes, so long as I also own up to my failures and refrain from excessive bragging.  This is, more or less, a family tradition; my mother got it from both sides of her family, and I suspect it went back a good deal of generations.  This isn’t rooted in shame or enforced humility; she just always says that if you’re truly doing good, you’re never going to need to tell anyone because they’ll already know.  As such, I try and keep an even keel.  My successes are celebrated freely, but I try to make sure the party doesn’t go on past eight.

So it’s been sort of a whirlwind ride the past few months.  I’ve now added “freelance voice talent”, to my list of accomplishments.  This goes up there with “Step-dad”, “husband”, “freelance writer”, “expectant father”, and a host of other rather amazing things.  I know I’ve brought this up before, yet I’m still not sure it has sunk in.  Part of me is still expecting to wake up, alone; to wake up from some fever dream.  That never happens, however; every time I wake up, things are as I left them.

Now granted, sometimes I’m waking up at 2:30 am to find that I rolled on top of my wife’s hair….but you take the good with the bad.  At least, that’s what she seems to do.

In either case, what I’d like to do right now is to thank the Gods for some of the things I have.  It strikes me that this is as appropriate a way of handling things as I can muster, as I’m still filled with awe at my recent accomplishments.  These things were not done alone, however, and I think it’s high time I offer some public thanks.

To the spirit/God/landvattier who appeared to me, and handed my the hammer.  I don’t know your name, and I suspect I never will.  I thank you.  I prayed, to nothing in particular, for peace of mind.  Little by little, the hammer you offered me that day has done just that.

To Frigg, who heard a very heartfelt prayer I made while inside a walk-in freezer.  You put me on a long road, Allmother, and I am eternally grateful.  I don’t know if it was You who ended up teaching me the lessons I would learn over the next two years…but I know who I asked for help, and I know who helped me.

To Freyr, who walked with me for so very little distance but whose lessons were profound.  I think back to that Freyfaxi, and I’m not sure I will ever be able to take in all that I was being shown.  I know that it taught me a lot, and it gave me the chance to see my own honor and my own frith.  The months that came after it showed me much as well, as I saw the consequences of frith betrayed.  Thank You.

To Eir, who I often forget when my need is no longer great.  I have prayed to You often, but I often forget to thank You after the matter is finished.  You’ve watched over family by blood, family by oath, and family by frith;.  for all of this, I thank You.

To Loki, much maligned and misunderstood.  I have heard many speak our against your supposed chaos, and sometimes I can’t help but wonder if that’s the joke.  You are not chaos, but a navigator of chaos; everyone who maligns you is cursing the very oar they need to navigate the twisting rivers that they blame you for creating.  I was caught in such chaos, and it was You who helped me back to solid ground.  It was You that helped me on my way, to the life I have now.  You didn’t give things to me; You just got me to the show and pulled up the curtains before I could think about it.  The “Regarding Loki” series was done as a small thanks for this.  Yet, in thanking you?  You helped me to start becoming the writer I always wanted to be.  When I have given you offerings of food and drink, you have provided far more then my pantry can hold.  Thank You.  Words cannot convey my gratitude.

To the Allfather, and all the divine figures and heroes who align themselves with him. To Thor, whose presence was ever felt in the background.  To all the Gods who have influenced my life, but have not yet made themselves known.  To those Gods I have prayed to, and cannot name.  I offer You my thanks for all that You have given me, and all that you have yet to give me.

Even when times are tough for me and my family, I have been able to count on Your blessings again and again.  Thank You all.

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